Our Experience With Samaritan Ministries

With the birth of Noah, our sixth child, we were able to experience something we had never experienced before. We received checks from others around the country to completely pay for our midwife assisted home birth. With prior births, we had to pay for the midwife out of pocket since no insurance plan we have ever had actually covered that. We'd like to share what we have learned with you and invite you to check it out for yourself.

About a year ago we decided to finally check out some of the medical expense sharing organizations we had heard about for a few years. We were intrigued with the idea of helping others with their medical bills, and then if we needed help, we could share our needs with others too. When we looked into the details, we were astonished to learn that what we were paying for high deductible (like $5K and $10K) medical insurance was more than we would need to share every month through most of these plans. We also learned that those who participate in a medical expense sharing plan are exempted from the "Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act." Encouraged by these discoveries, we went about researching the various options out there.

After researching several options we chose to go with Samaritan Ministries and it has been a real blessing. As of June 2012, we are one of about 21,000 families sharing medical expenses around the world. Our total sharing amount is $355 a month (for a family of 8), and we can share any medical expense (there are some limitations) over $300. This encourages us to consider what we choose to spend our medical dollars on, while helping to cover us when we have a larger need.

Here are some other things we really like about Samaritan Ministries:

• We send our checks directly to someone who has a need every month
• There are no hidden administrative costs - only one check for $175 a year covers all administrative costs
• Prayer requests and non-covered needs (like pre-existing conditions, oral surgery, etc) are shared for all to consider
• Samaritan Ministries is a non-profit charitable organization
• Their staff has been very helpful and servant-minded every time we have interacted with them

~ Mark

If you would like to learn more you can fill out this very simple form and they will send you a packet of information about the plan. If you do, there is a spot to mention how you heard about them. We kindly ask that you mention us in that spot: Mark & Rebecca Miller.

Noah's Birth Photos

 

Thank you, Lauren, for taking pictures for us - you have a natural gift!

Naming Noah John

On Wednesday, October 3rd at 3:14 PM, our Noah John was born.  The plan was for Mark to share what his name would be after he was born, but we had a funny thing happen earlier in the week that changed that!  People kept asking me what the name would be, and I kept telling them I didn’t know – Mark would decide.  Mark and I have been joking for a while that the birth would be like when Elizabeth had Jesus’ cousin and Zechariah, the father, asked for a writing tablet and wrote his name after his birth. 

Noah, moments after birth

In the past, I'd come up with names, and Mark would let me know if he didn't like something.  But he didn't typically come up with ideas for names, so one of the names I'd brainstormed would be what we went with.  Based on that pattern, I’d been pondering names for many months.  For most of the pregnancy, the name Levi was at the top of my list.  But as time went on, I felt in my spirit that he was really Noah, which means “rest.”  About the time that transition happened, Mark communicated a new kind of leading in choosing our son's name, which was certainly welcome to me.  Mark wanted to take some time to figure out what the name should be.  In an email, I forwarded my 'list,' comprised of about a dozen names and meanings for him to take into consideration.  Some of my favorite middle names were Shiloh, meaning “tranquil, peaceful” and Jeremiah, meaning “God will set free.”

Sweet joy and relief!

In general, the birth of our children have been good experiences, though never easy for me.  Throughout Noah’s pregnancy, if I started thinking about the birth and the pain involved, I would simply push the thought away.  But, about a month before his birth, the Lord poured out a special peace and expectancy over me that was clearly supernatural.  When thoughts of birth came up, there was nothing to push away – there was just peace.

Unbeknownst to me, Mark didn’t want to be influenced by my list, but rather he just wanted to hear from the Lord what the name should be.  When looking over names that had to do with peace or rest, Mark felt his name was to be Noah..  Looking up names that had to do with ‘grace’ – with the idea of resting in the Lord’s grace – Mark felt that the middle name should be John.  We’ve always tried to avoid common names, however, since our last name is very common.  Mark felt sure that I wouldn’t be happy about going with ‘John.’ 

Sunday, Mark mentioned that he knew what the name would be, but he wasn’t sure I’d be pleased with the middle name because it is common.  I immediately heard from the Lord, ‘John.’  This name had never been one we considered in the past, but I did remember reading the meaning of it before and thinking how great the meaning was.

Monday night after Mark returned home from the church men’s meeting, he mentioned a friend joking that the baby should be named “Steven Mark” (because the friend’s name is Steve  : )  I joked with Mark and said, “or Mark John.”  Now I knew the name "Mark" was not a consideration in Mark’s mind, but I was feeling playful and wanted to see his reaction regarding the middle name.  He was really taken aback and asked how I knew.  He kept laughing and couldn’t get over how cool it was that the Lord spoke the same name to me.  So he shared then that the first name would be Noah, which I was thrilled with – and I was of course thrilled with “John” as well.  Though it's common, how could I not be pleased with a name the Lord led Mark to, which is the name of a disciple Jesus dearly loved, as well as his cousin John the Baptist who lived and died so passionately for him.

It occurred to us at the end of our conversation that the name that Zechariah wrote on his writing tablet was “John!”  How neat that our little joking comments regarding Zechariah actually tied in to this middle name that the Lord gave us for our sweet new baby.  So, we pray that our Noah John will rest in the Lord – rest in His grace.

A Silent Loss

Between our second and third sons, in the spring of 2004, we experienced our first miscarriage.  The emotional pain – and the length of that mourning - caught me by surprise.  I knew, through friends, that miscarriage was hard.  But of course there’s nothing like going through something yourself to truly bring it from your head to your heart.

Once again we find ourselves in a season of hardship, having gone through three miscarriages starting in July 2011.  Mark and I have had several conversations throughout this time, and we desire to communicate from our heart on this issue that touches so many.  One thing that comes to mind is how miscarriage underscores how precious the gift of children is.  Pain and loss emphasize the fragility of life and help us to experience gratitude.

Another thing I’ve longed to communicate is quite raw, so forgive me if this is awkward.  Of my four miscarriages, three have been quite early, so that the physical experience wasn’t very different from a regular cycle.  One occurred a bit later, at 8 weeks.  The day after the miscarriage began, Mark and I had a date night scheduled.  I decided to go forward with that, thinking that a night away may be helpful.  As it turned out, the miscarriage really ‘kicked in’ and as I sat in the movie theater, I could feel something passing through me.  It was a strange, surreal time as I stood in the bathroom stall afterward, trying to process what to do.  I was clueless about the reality of a later miscarriage (and 8 weeks is still quite early), so I was caught off-guard.  After all, the ultrasound tech said there was no longer any sac, yet here it was.  The medical world may simply deem this as ‘tissue’ to be discarded, but my heart told me to gently wrap this little one that we mourned so that we could have a time of memorial together.  When I came out, I was in a numb emotional place and shared with Mark what had happened.  He cried and hugged me, and we headed home.  

We were able to place our itty bitty baby in a little box and have a memorial in the backyard as a family.  We each shared the things we mourned about this baby.  The children shared their hearts that they were sad to not get to hold this baby, to not watch this baby grow up.  We were able to express the reality that we would meet the baby one day in heaven, and how exciting that would be.  It was a sweet, healing time that I’m thankful for.

Shortly after that miscarriage, my neighbor experienced a miscarriage at 11 weeks and we spoke on the phone.  She hadn’t started bleeding yet, and I shared with her my experience to give her an idea of what to expect.  She was able to avoid the medication often prescribed to ‘hurry things along’ and was able to avoid a D & C.  Later, she shared how glad she was that we got to talk.  She was able to pass the baby naturally and was able to see her little one – perfect little nose, ears, mouth – the sweet reality of this person she was carrying.  She expressed that seeing her baby actually helped to bring closure and was healthy for her emotional healing.  Without expecting what would naturally occur, she may have chosen a different route which would have emotionally separated her from the physical experience and would have left her in a numb emotional place.

After speaking with her, I felt anger regarding how miscarriage is dealt with in our society.  This silent, painful process is often treated in such a dry, medical manner, so that women are left in an emotionally numb state – unable to walk through the mourning process in a healthy way.  I encourage us, especially as women, to share our experiences with one another and to embrace the grieving that is very real regarding losing a child – whether through miscarriage, stillbirth, or a child that was born, lived, and then passed.  Ignorant words can be spoken, resulting in mothers feeling frustrated and hurt.  A future baby cannot replace the baby that was lost.  Minimizing the reality of a baby (for example, with a very early miscarriage) does not minimize the pain, but rather leaves mothers feeling invalidated.

There were a couple of books that were uplifting to me through these miscarriages.  While they are not specifically on miscarriage, they were very timely.  One is “One Thousand Gifts” by Ann Voskamp.  This beautifully written book (truly – a piece of art) expresses how to experience joy in life amidst the raw pain that we are sure to walk through.  It’s a real life-changer, whether your pain is monumental or whether your pain is regarding the dullness of life – dishes, diapers and all.  Another wonderful piece of encouragement is “Heaven is for Real” by Todd Burpo.  This amazing non-fiction captures a four year old’s experience with heaven that occurred when he died during an operation.  One aspect of it included his meeting his miscarried sister, whom he’d never been told about.  He shared impossible-to-know details regarding her and many other things.  We know that we will meet our miscarried children in heaven, and this book was a beautiful reminder of that fact.  It was healing not only for me as a mother, but also for my two oldest sons who read it.

My hope in sharing our experience is simply that by bringing it to light, it will be an encouragement to some of you who have walked this same journey.  Our culture is often silent and confused regarding miscarriage.  Mark pondered this after a conversation with a customer over the register, as tears came to her eyes over her recent miscarriage.  Sometimes it helps just to know that you’re not alone in your pain, and that your pain is certainly very real.

A Knock On the Door

It’s been a long time since I’ve enjoyed writing a post.  On those rare occasions that I cannot sleep, I often feel the Lord impressing on me a story to share.  Tonight, for some reason, it is an old story that I have wanted to write, but never did find the time.

In the Fall of 2002, Mark and I lived in San Diego, California with our two young boys (Pierce – 2 ½; Jaden – 6 months).  Mark worked as an electrical engineer at Intel, and found himself at an interesting crossroads with his career.  When Mark was a bachelor, he put in long hours at work with little consequence.  Once we married, however, and especially after we started having children, the expectations grew to be unreasonable.  Mark’s work/life balance was painfully off-balance, to the tune of being expected to work 80 hours per week.  He began to seek the Lord constantly in prayer regarding the situation, and interestingly, things at work grew to be ridiculously painful.  It became clear to Mark that he was to quit.  Interesting, considering that his goal prior to this season in life was to work his way up the ladder to become a VP at Intel.

In December 2002, we visited friends of ours in Houston.  Knowing that Mark planned to quit in the Spring, they joked that we should move to Houston and purchase a lot in their neighborhood.  They recently built a new home on a golf course, and empty lots lined their street.  This joke held no temptation for Mark, but I actually found the idea rather appealing.  I spoke with him within the next couple of days regarding the many benefits to moving to Houston (cheaper cost of living, living near good friends, support with home schooling, etc.).  He was not impressed… at all.  But he said that he would pray about it, and he was open to my staying a bit longer in Houston to research building a home on a lot.  You could say he was humoring me  : )

Things seemed to fall easily into place regarding the home we would want built in Houston.  When Spring arrived, we had one foot invested in building a home on a lot across the street from our good friends.  It was a low risk to Mark, because pulling out meant little money lost.  He was happy living in our home in a beautiful valley in San Diego.  Moving to Houston still held little appeal, but he was faithful in prayer, asking for confirmation.  He planned to quit in April, as he felt the Lord was leading him clearly in that area, but he had no idea what was around the corner regarding career.  There was no reason – yet – to move.

One Saturday that Spring, Mark lined up a few different realtors to interview them regarding selling our home in San Diego.  Once again, he was just speculating – simply doing his research.  A heavy, closed door regarding moving to Houston would be a great relief to Mark.  But if the Lord knew better, Mark would certainly follow.

Mind you, our home was not on the market.  There was no ‘For Sale’ sign in the yard.  Mark was simply talking with three realtors, one interview lined up after another, at our kitchen table.  During one of the interviews, the realtor shared with Mark a story about a home in our neighborhood.  The home was not for sale, but someone knocked on the door asking to buy it, and the house ended up being sold to them.  In the midst of this story, exactly when the lady said the word “knocked,” there was a knock on our door.  Not the ringing of a door bell.  A knock.  Mark got up, answered the door, and was in shock to hear a man expressing interest in seeing our home -  to possibly purchase it.  Mark motioned to the lady at our kitchen table, to express that he was currently talking with a realtor and would have to get back with him.  The man expressed that he, himself, was a realtor.  He explained that he had a client that may be interested in our home.  And beyond that, he and his wife were interested personally. 

After viewing our home, his client was indeed interested, which irritated his wife because she was interested in our home!  Short story - a contract was signed within three days for them to purchase our home (wife won, client lost!).  No fees, mind you, because he was a realtor and took care of the paperwork himself.  Also, Mark asked that the sale of their home not be contingent, which the realtor had no qualms with.  Mark was blown away.

With little doubt that he was not only to quit his job, but also to move to Houston, Mark willingly went through the motions to move our family to a hot, humid, flat city with plenty of traffic.  Obedient to the promptings God gave us, his nervous stomach didn’t follow suit as easily, and he threw up that first night in our new home in Houston.  He laughs about that now, as we’ve been so incredibly blessed by God’s redirection in our lives.

In the Fall of 2003, fires tore through San Diego, burning down homes in our old area and altering the beautiful views of that valley that we lived in.  Mark pondered the sad timing of that tragedy with awe.  Looking back, we also wonder that if we had stayed in San Diego, Mark most likely would have taken another high-tech job (leading to more work/life imbalance) through connections with friends, rather than start the family business that the Lord led him to in Houston.  Not to mention, we couldn’t have afforded to survive financially in San Diego, with its cost of living, running our family business. 

The Lord works in mysterious ways.  We find that the directions He has us take often look ‘crazy’ to the world.  But if we follow, we find ourselves on a beautiful path.  We’re thankful that He intervened in the details of Mark’s career, which has altered the dynamics of our family dramatically for the better.  We marvel at the confirmations He gave us along the way, including that perfectly timed knock on the door.

A Long Time Comin'

It's time to finally post some pictures!  Here are some snippets since moving last October (can you tell, I can't keep up??)...

The boys made a special anniversary dinner for us in February.  They created the surprise menu themselves and did a fantastic job.  Crawfish etouffee,  hush puppies, old fashioned baked beans, and poached pears - yum!

We were appreciative and look forward to next year's dinner!

Pierce decided to make Jesus his Lord in February.  He put Christ on in baptism... what a wonderful day!

 Pierce wears Ezra.  He's a great helper, and loves his younger brothers and sister (with plenty of conflict, of course!)...

 

Fishing with Paw Paw Schell in Baton Rouge.

During Maw Maw & Paw Paw Miller's visit, Paw Paw helped us build a fence around the garden to keep deer and other critters out.  

There was plenty of fun to be had with Maw Maw Miller out on the street!

 

 

 

A wonderful time was had camping at Mission Tejas in early April with our dear friends Don & Melissa.

We've found that we don't even need to go camping now to come in contact with very large bugs.  Our home on a shady acre is stocked full of creatures!  This one greeted me one morning in the den.  He was about 5 inches across.  Perhaps he is a she, though... that fat body may hold plenty of babies!  Eeeek!

 

 In April, we also got to visit with Maw Maw & Paw Paw Schell as well as my sister & her family at Lake Catherine State Park in Arkansas.  While there, we visited Mark's brother and his family.

In July, Jaden & Elijah went on an RV trip to Estes Park, Colorado with Maw Maw & Paw Paw Schell.  The rest of us flew up to join them for the last week.  We had a great time!